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The Worst Part of the Going Bald Process

the worst part of the going bald process

It’s not when you first realize you’re losing your hair, because at that point you will still have a good amount left before anyone starts noticing.

It’s not the moment you go completely bald, because by that time you will have gotten over it, whether that means you did something to preserve it (medication or surgery) or you did something to accept it (shave your head – my personal choice).

The worst part of the going bald process is when you get to the point where you can no longer hide it. The point where everyone knows you’re going bald AND they know that you are trying to cover it up.

This is the point when I had the most anxiety. I had reached the threshold where I had to do something about it. I had earlier given up on propecia because of side effects. Volumizing shampoos were no longer getting the job done. Natural remedies were worthless. And there was no way in hell I was going to buy a hair piece or undergo any kind of hair transplant surgery.

So what were my options?

1. I could’ve preserved my hair (not an option given aforementioned reasons)
2. I could have continued attempting to cover up my hair loss, basically hiding from reality.
3. I could have buzzed off my hair.

Two options.

Hide from it or accept it.

Read about my choice to accept hair loss in this post.

When I think about it, I regret not being more preemptive about my hair loss. I kept holding out, not trying to address it, always trying to hide it and keep it concealed. I would have rather spent 20 minutes adjusting my hair in the morning than actually facing up to it and dealing with it once and for all.

My advice to you? Don’t let it get to this point. Take action before hand. The action I recommend of course is to shave your head. Treating your hair loss, getting surgery – these things carry risk and they also won’t liberate you, they will further enslave you to hair loss. When I wake up in the morning, I drag my hand across my head and it is an incredible feeling.

I don’t have to worry about how my hair looks in the mirror. I don’t have to worry about whether a fluorescent light will expose my scalp. I don’t have to worry about getting my hair wet and then having to readjust it in a mirror. Put simply: I don’t have to worry. Imagine what that would feel like for a moment.

If you know what I’m talking about or if you’re completely confused and/or upset about my remarks here, feel free to sound of in the comments below. Feedback is always welcome here.

{ 4 comments… add one }

  • Steve April 7, 2012, 11:21 am

    You really hit it on the head. It’s a very liberating thing to buzz it. I too realized there is more fear in going bald than being bald. When I buzzed mine I felt like a piano was lifted off my back. I still wear a hat too much but I can take it off whereas before I could not. The final step is ditching the hat for good. Just like the pool….jump in. Don’t drag it out.

    • phil April 7, 2012, 2:13 pm

      Piano off the back is a perfect way to describe it. Thanks for the comment, Steve.

  • Daniel September 20, 2012, 9:52 pm

    I’m 29, but noticed the gradual receding of my hairline since i was 22. I used to be able to hide it, but I’m totally at that point where I can’t, people know something is going on up there. You are totally right, this stage is the WORST part. I find myself consumed with it, I avoid making eye contact with attractive women because I figure they will have no interest in me anyways.

    I’m constantly adjusting my hair and going to the bathroom at work for a “hair check” and it’s really starting to wear on me. I’m pretty depressed man and just reading this article gave me some hope. I’m totally missing out on a lot of things in life because I’m insecure over my thinning hair. I’m afraid of bright lighting, I don’t go swimming anymore… I don’t even like people walking behind me for fear they’ll catch my bald spot. It’s like I’d rather live in the shadows! This is not how I want to live, but I can’t help it. I feel like I’m genetically inferior and figure what woman will want to marry a bald guy and take wedding pictures with one. A lot of people don’t understand how painful and devastating it is for a young person to go through this. Anyways, thanks for doing what you do because I don’t have anyone to talk about this with or confide in so it helps to read that you went through the same crap and that there is hope for me. I’m seriously considering shaving my head during the winter break, I need to set myself free and just embrace it. Still have to summon the courage though!


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